Friday, February 20, 2009

No Matter How Miffed I Am, I'll Watch 'Em Anyway

It's time again for the most self-congratulatory 232 minutes of the year! I'm obviously referring to the Oscars, since my obsession with movies knows no bounds. Since I feel like absolute ass--we always get sick on our weeks off, don't we?--I'll keep this short and to the point. Here are my picks and my Dark Horses:

Actor in a Leading Role: This is remarkable close to call. Rourke and Penn both turn in powerhouse performances here...but Milk isn't going to win Best Picture so they might give it Best Actor. And Penn's got himself a BIO-PIC!! But Rourke has won the other major awards and everyone loves a comeback...
Winner: Sean Penn
Dark Horse: Really not so dark and I think he deserves it more; Mickey Rourke

Actor in a Supporting Role:
Winner: Heath Leadger. Duh.
Dark Horse: I have a better shot at winning this award than the 4 other nominees.

Actress in a Leading Role: Here's where those politics come in. Hathaway is dynamite in Rachel Getting Married and to watch Streep do anything on camera is to watch greatness incarnate. But can the Academy deny Kate Winslet any longer? And no nomination for Revolutionary Road?
Winner: Kate Winslet
Dark Horse: Ann Hathaway

Actress in a Supporting Role: I didn't see Vicky Cristina Barcelona! Everyone seems certain Cruz will win!? What to do!?!? The two performances in Doubt are stellar. Tomei is really quite good in The Wrestler as well. I'll just throw it out there...
Winner: Viola Davis
Dark Horse: Marisa Tomei

Animated Feature Film: Sigh. Here's where the Travesty Alert! begins. Wall-E shouldn't be in this category. More on that later.
Winner: Wall-E
Dark Horse: nada.

Art Direction: I haven't seen three of these nominees. I know, I know. I'm calling my own Film Geek credibility into question. The two I have seen are really, really good. But there's a period piece nominated! You know what that means...
Winner: The Duchess
Dark Horse: The Dark Knight

Cinematography: The cinematography of Slumdog Millionaire actually works against the movie for me. But no matter; it'll more than likely win.
Winner: Slumdog Millionaire
Dark Horse: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button which really should win this award.

Costume Design: PERIOD PIECE!
Winner: The Duchess
Dark Horse: Who knows. Let's call Milk because everyone loves the 70's.

Directing: The fact that Christopher Nolan is not nominated for this award shows how badly the Academy dropped the ball this year.
Winner: As much as it pains me to write...Danny Boyle
Dark Horse: David Fincher; again, who should win.

Documentary: I haven't seen ANY of these, feature length or short. Which is unlike me.

Editing: Because Academy voters get carried away...
Winner: Slumdog Millionaire
Dark Horse: Milk; the editing here (and direction) is what sets this film apart from standard Bio-Pic fare.

Foreign Language Film: None of these played in the Buffalo area, which is a bummer, since I really want to see The Class.

Makeup: Anyone else notice the Academy screws this award up a lot?
Winner: Hellboy II; even though this won't win, I have to pick it
Dark Horse: The Curious Case of Bejamin Button; which will win

Score: This is probably the only category I actually like Slumdog for.
Winner: Slumdog Millionaire
Dark Horse: Wall-E

Song: Again, ball=dropped. How is Springsteen not nominated?
Winner: Wall-E; Slumdog splits its vote!
Dark Horse:

Sound Editing:
Winner: The Dark Knight
Dark Horse: Iron Man

Sound Mixing:
Winner: the Dark Knight
Dark Horse: Wanted

Visual Effects:
Winner: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button
Dark Horse: Iron Man

Adapted Screenplay: I'd love to read that Fitzgerald story Button is based on.
Winner: Doubt
Dark Horse: The Reader

Original Screenplay:
Winner: Milk
Dark Horse: Wall-E

Best Picture: Oh, my, my, my. What a load of crap this category is. I am floored by how WRONG this list is. We all know the most overrated film of the year--I'm talking to YOU, Slumdog Millionaire!--is going to win. Problem is, it shouldn't have been nominated in the first place. THREE of these films shouldn't be on this list. Slumdog Millionaire, Frost/Nixon and The Reader, while all good films, have no business being here. Those three should be replaced with Wall-E, The Dark Knight and The Wrestler. Maybe even Doubt. Crap.
Winner: I can't bring myself to type the title...
Dark Horse: The Curious Case of Benjamin Button



Anonymous said...

I've almost given up on reading people's Oscar lists, because they always remind me that The Dark Knight isn't nominated for any of the big ones (outside of Ledger.) That, and Slumdog was a wee overrated. I'm all about The Wrestler here.

Although I will forever contend that The Dark Knight is one of the best films I've ever seen.


English Teacher Extraordinaire said...

You and I concur, young man. The thought that The Dark Knight can have EIGHT noms but not one for its Director is mind-boggling.

The Wrestler was a fabulous movie.

mineIsay said...

and here I thought "Best Wedding Ever" would be the next post :( Stupid Oscars.